


wish i could keep you in amber (safe from the outside)

by punknouis



Series: angels circle around you (cause you shouldn't be on your own) [2]
Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra, Avatar: The Last Airbender, The Rise of Kyoshi (Avatar), The Shadow of Kyoshi (Avatar)
Genre: Avatar: The Last Airbender – The Rise of Kyoshi, Avatar: The Last Airbender – The Shadow of Kyoshi, Conversations, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Getting Back Together, Hair Braiding, Mutual Pining, Pining, Rangshi - Freeform, Reconciliation, Unresolved Emotional Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-07
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 07:01:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28988196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/punknouis/pseuds/punknouis
Summary: Avoidance might be the only ability Kyoshi has truly mastered, long before she became the Avatar.Kyoshi avoids Rangi, until she can't anymore. A hard conversation is had.
Relationships: Kyoshi/Rangi (Avatar)
Series: angels circle around you (cause you shouldn't be on your own) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2098698
Comments: 14
Kudos: 64
Collections: Winter ATLA Femslash Week 2021





	wish i could keep you in amber (safe from the outside)

**Author's Note:**

> for everyone who requested this...thank you for waiting! all of your lovely comments and encouragement on Old Wounds really gave me the motivation to scrape this together. it has been really emotionally taxing writing this due to what is going on in my personal life (hence why it took so long to get done), but i hope I was still able to do it justice. anything for rangshi <3
> 
> Also, femslash week! hair braiding! it's late but i figured i could make it work.
> 
> Unfortunately I feel like this won't make too much sense if you haven't read Old Wounds so maybe go and do that if you haven't and then come back to this? :)
> 
> title and quote in the beginning are from Stay Gold by PVRIS

_If you're just a wind passing through, I'd still be grateful_

_But I pray to God every day that we don't break, no_

_You've seen my dark side, I left it on the table_

_- **Stay Gold**_

* * *

Kyoshi definitely thought it would be easier to have this conversation. She thought she would be jumping at the chance. But instead, every time Rangi was near, Kyoshi _literally_ ran in the opposite direction.

When they finally landed back in Yokoya and were unloading their bags off of Yingyong’s saddle, she pretended she couldn’t feel Rangi’s eyes burning into the back of her head. Her stomach turned at the thought of having to talk about the past couple of years, and her confidence had waned on the journey home.

What could she possibly say? That she endured the torture of not having Rangi fully, in the way she wanted most, just because it was better than not having her at all? How pathetic was that?

And she definitely couldn’t handle hearing Rangi’s voice shake, trying to explain why she did what she did. She couldn't bear to see the strong woman she loved so much have to do that.

Kyoshi declared, to no one in particular, that she was exhausted and was going to her room to sleep, and she was thankful that no one followed her.

The next few days are spent avoiding Rangi, and the conversation they needed to have, like the plague.

At breakfast, Kyoshi shoveled food into her mouth at record speeds and would rise from the table just as quickly. Sitting in one spot for too long opens up too many windows for conversation.

Typically, she storms into the kitchen, grabs what she would like and then disappears before Auntie Mui can scold her for still acting like a servant girl.

But going to the kitchen would offer a secluded area for Rangi to corner her in. Too many quite halls and empty rooms.

So she forces herself to sit in the dining room to eat, surrounded by servants and usually accompanied by Jinpa, but keeps her mouth full so she is unable to participate in the back and forth that happens around her.

When she has time to train, she makes up an excuse as to why she can’t train with Rangi.

She tells her she’s focusing on her airbending. That isn't a lie. Jinpa is no master, but he has shown her some of the basics that no one else has taken the time to show her.

When Kyoshi storms into his room at the mansion, made up for him so that he can stay whenever and for as long as he likes, he doesn’t do more than raise an eyebrow. He dutifully puts down whatever he is working on and follows Kyoshi out into the fields.

When Rangi tried to protest one day, saying that Kyoshi needed to continue training with all of the elements, Jinpa stepped in and spoke so Kyoshi wouldn’t have to.

"She's making great progress, I think she should continue maintaining her focus on airbending for the moment. Besides, becoming quicker and more light on her feet will only serve her more when practicing the other elements."

He didn’t bring up the angry way Kyoshi shot tight spirals of air past his torso after that, making his sunset colored robes blow around him. His face remained neutral as he dodges each blow, and she’d never been more grateful for him.

She sneaks off into town almost every day. She's surprised Rangi hasn't flipped on her for it, being her bodyguard and all. But Kyoshi hasn't given her a moment long enough to do so. And Rangi isn’t exactly the biggest fan of the people of Yokoya, so it's unlikely she would ever follow Kyoshi.

Kyoshi walks down by the docks, closing her eyes and listening to the shouting of fishermen as they unload their catches from that morning. She breathes in the smell of the sea, the salt sticking to the inside of her nose.

She still gets odd looks, _guilty_ looks from most Yokoyans. By now they all know of her title. Her status. She is still largely ignored in the place she grew up, but now it is out of fear rather than disgust.

The townspeople might pretend like they don’t remember how they treated her in the past, but the deliberate way they clear a path as Kyoshi walks through the streets suggests otherwise. Which is fine. She prefers it this way. The less conflict, the less confrontation, the better.

Avoidance might be the only ability Kyoshi has truly mastered, long before she became the Avatar.

During dinner a week after their return, Kyoshi can’t shake the feeling of dread that is sitting on her chest.

Rangi’s eyes are once again burning holes into the side of her head, and Kyoshi thinks she might break the spoon in her hand with how hard she is concentrating on ignoring her.

Kyoshi eats in silence, letting Jinpa and Atuat’s conversation buzz like white noise in her ears. Normally she would happily listen to the back and forth, and laugh along to Atuat’s stories. But it’s hard to concentrate on anything else when there’s tension brewing from across the table. If the rest of them can feel it, they’re doing a good job of ignoring it. Much better than Kyoshi is doing.

When she finishes her soup, she rises from the table and mutters out an excuse to leave.

She walks swiftly through the halls back to her room. The bed creaks underneath her weight when she returns. She releases a heavy exhale. Finally alone.

She pulls the band from her hair, letting the long brown strands fall down her back. She gathers her hair to the side, splits it into three sections, and begins intertwining them.

Her fingers move deftly, working from muscle memory. She closes her eyes and lets her head empty as she focuses on the soft strands twisting together.

She doesn’t remember who taught her how to braid, if anyone did. She feels a twinge of bitterness at the fact that it should have been her mother who taught her.

(Maybe she did. Would Kyoshi remember that? Would that change anything?)

She pushes the thought aside.

Right as she’s about to tie off the end of the plait, there’s a stern knock on the door.

“Come in,” she calls out, cursing herself for the way her voice cracks.

The door opens slowly. Rangi steps in, still wearing her usual armor. Her eyebrows are drawn together. She looks determined, like she’s mentally working through battle plans. 

Kyoshi looks to the floor as she ties the ribbon around her hair. Rangi doesn't even greet Kyoshi, choosing to immediately lay into her.

"You left the mansion without telling me. _Several_ times. Don't you know how dangerous that is? It's my duty to protect you. How can I do that if you're running out without anyone knowing where you are?! You're lucky Jinpa was there to speak on your behalf. If it weren't for him, I would have followed you out there and dragged you back here by your robes."

Kyoshi visibly cringes knowing she's been caught. That doesn't stop Rangi.

"You've been avoiding me," she states plainly and crosses her arms across her chest.

“It wasn't intentional?” Kyoshi squeaks out, hopeful that the weak excuse will satiate the firebender.

Rangi rolls her eyes. She walks over and sits down on the bed beside Kyoshi with a deep sigh.

Kyoshi sighs in return. “It was intentional," she admits.

Rangi waves her off, deflated now that she has let her initial frustrations out. “You’re not the only one who isn’t excited for this conversation.”

Moments of tense silence pass between them, neither of them knowing where to start. Up close, the soldier is lacking her usual air of confidence. She smoothes her hands over her pants several times, and her foot taps lightly on the ground. Kyoshi can't help the way her heart aches seeing her glowing girl so nervous and out of her element.

Rangi lifts a hand, and for a minute Kyoshi thinks she’s going to touch her. But instead, she grasps Kyoshi’s braid gently.

“This is pretty, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you wear a braid before.”

She traces her fingers slowly over the twisted pattern before awkwardly dropping her hand back on the bed.

“Thanks,” Kyoshi mumbles.

Finally Rangi clears her throat and angles herself to face Kyoshi fully. “I’m sorry. I just need to start there. I’m sorry for the horrible position I put you in for so long.”

Her amber eyes are downcast, with guilt and shame painted all over her face.

“I know I’ve been selfish, and I’ve disgraced myself as your bodyguard and as your companion. I should cut my hair for what I’ve done to you. Not just because you’re the Avatar, but because you’re you. You’re Kyoshi. You didn’t deserve to have your heart toyed with like that. You deserve to be loved and cherished. I don’t expect you to be able to ever forgive me, but I just needed you to know that I’m done hurting you the way I have.” 

Tears push around Kyoshi's eyes, threatening to spill over, but they don’t just yet.

“I don’t think you need to cut your hair, that's just...” she trails off, trying to make her words sound lighthearted by smiling softly. But it falters, and she can't finish her sentence, and she knows it’s obvious to Rangi. 

Rangi pulls Kyoshi’s hands from her lap to hold them firmly before saying earnestly, “I’ll spend my whole life proving to you how sorry I am.”

Again, she shows Kyoshi she knows her better than the Avatar knows herself.

Kyoshi always thought that she would rather have Rangi physically than not at all. She hadn’t realized what a toll it had been taking on her heart and her mind to be strung along for so long, to second guess herself and place her worth in the hands of another.

The apology, the admittance of guilt, taking responsibility for her actions...it is what she needed to hear, but she hadn't known until this moment. Now the tears pour down Kyoshi’s face uncontrollably.

This time Rangi’s hand does meet Kyoshi’s face, her thumb moving slowly over her cheek. She gives Kyoshi a watery smile of her own. 

Kyoshi lets out a shaky breath, “I missed you so much. I missed just being with you. Talking with you, holding you, like before.”

“I did too,” Rangi sighs and closes her eyes, “I was just so scared. After everything that happened, I didn’t want anyone else I love to get hurt. But I was hurting you this whole time.”

“I know, I don’t blame you for being scared. And it’s --”

“Don’t say it’s okay,” Rangi cuts her off sternly. “You’re allowed to be upset with me. You’re allowed to demand more for yourself.”

Kyoshi knows her eyes must be as wide as saucers right now. She can’t find the words to respond, so she doesn’t even try. She just nods and leans into Rangi’s hand that is still holding her face. She presses a kiss into the palm of Rangi’s hand.

_We're going to be alright_ , she thinks. _Now that we're together_ . _Really together again._

It’s going to take time to build themselves back up, to fix the broken trust. But it’s not going to be all worked out tonight. They have time. 

She doesn’t say all this. She only asks, “Stay with me tonight?”

Rangi leans in and kisses Kyoshi softly. It ignites something inside Kyoshi, so different from the kisses they’ve shared the past year or so. It feels like the first time, the one by the lake, the first kiss that made her head swim.

Her next words come out as a whisper across Kyoshi’s lips, “I’ll stay with you forever, if you’ll have me.”

**Author's Note:**

> Avatar Kyoshi, Master of Avoidance!
> 
> i hope it lived up to expectations! apologies for how short it is! i would love to add more to this series in the future, so let me know what you think/what you'd like to see/etc.
> 
> come talk to me about rangshi on tumblr --> moderndaygaang


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